Bassist
Bassist Retirement Apron Featuring a Distressed Bass Guitar
Bassist retirement apron - Distressed bass guitar headstock with stacked text YES I DO HAVE A RETIREMENT I PLAN
US$19.95
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
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US$19.95
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Bassist Retirement Apron Featuring a Distressed Bass Guitar is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
bassist retirement apron features the phrase YES I DO HAVE A RETIREMENT -PLAN- I PLAN ON PLAYING THE BASS across the front panel, and the stacked white and red lettering reads as a pun about continuing to play music after work ends. Wearing it signals that cooking is temporary while music is permanent, and retired musicians or bandmates who appreciate the double meaning will feel this was made for them.
What Is Printed On It
The printed design centers a distressed white bass guitar headstock with four tuning pegs against black and red accents. Stacked vertically above the instrument, the text begins with YES I DO HAVE A in white, followed by a large arched RETIREMENT in red, and a small -PLAN- flanked by two small hearts. Below the headstock, a white banner contains I PLAN ON PLAYING THE, sitting above the word BASS which is flanked by red flames on either side. The entire graphic uses a weathered texture that gives the print a vintage, worn appearance suitable for a musician's lifestyle.
Who Reaches For This One
This bassist retirement apron targets retired players and active bassists who view their instrument as a lifelong passion rather than just a job. It serves as a humorous gift for birthdays or retirement celebrations where the recipient prefers jamming over retiring. The design works best in casual kitchen settings where the wearer wants to announce that they are officially off the clock but still ready to perform.
Questions Before You Order
Does this apron have pockets? Yes, it includes two front pockets measuring 8 x 7 inches each, split in the middle to accommodate different storage needs while maintaining structural integrity during use.
Will the ink survive washing? Yes, the distressed print is durable enough for standard laundering because the fabric is 10 oz cotton canvas that stiffens initially but softens after two to three washes without damaging the design.
Is the joke literal or a pun? The phrase plays on the word bass referring to the musical instrument rather than low-frequency sound, confirming through the printed text that the wearer intends to continue making music regardless of their employment status.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Bassist aprons
- Who is this collection best suited for?
- This collection is ideal for professional and amateur bass players across genres. Whether you play upright, electric, or bassoon, these designs honor your specific instrument choice and the crucial rhythmic role you provide within any ensemble setting.
- What themes are featured in these designs?
- The designs feature musical symbols, instrument silhouettes, and abstract representations of sound waves. Themes include classical motifs for double bassists and modern graphic styles for electric players, ensuring every musician finds a visual language that matches their personal aesthetic and genre preference.
- How do I choose the right design?
- Select based on your primary instrument and preferred artistic style. If you play upright, consider the acoustic motif sea apron for its classic feel. Electric players might prefer the sharper lines of the cleff bass apron to match their modern, amplified sound profile.
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