

Alway Diving Apron Featuring Sarcastic Blue Typography
Alway diving apron - Distressed blue stacked text with hidden swimmer silhouette inside the word DIVER
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Alway Diving Apron Featuring Sarcastic Blue Typography is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
alway diving apron displays the phrase ALWAYS BE NICE TO A DIVER WE KNOW PLACES WHERE NOBODY WILL FIND YOU across the front. The text is stacked in four lines with a distressed finish in light and dark blue. This sarcastic joke implies divers know secret underwater spots to hide evidence. Wearing it signals you share their sense of humor, making it perfect for scuba instructors and ocean adventurers.
What The Print Says
The typography uses only two shades of blue with a worn, distressed texture that mimics weathered paint. The word DIVER is significantly larger than the surrounding lines and contains a dark blue graphic silhouette of a swimmer within its letters. The remaining text reads ALWAYS BE NICE TO A above the large word, followed by WE KNOW PLACES and WHERE NOBODY WILL FIND YOU below. All lettering is arranged in a strict vertical stack centered on the panel. This layout focuses attention entirely on the humorous warning without distracting graphics or borders.
The Cook It Was Made For
This alway diving apron suits scuba divers and snorkelers who appreciate dark humor about underwater secrets. It serves as a funny birthday or Christmas gift for skilled divers and instructors who want to make others laugh. The design fits everyday kitchen use where the wearer wants to signal their hobby through sarcasm rather than literal marine imagery.
Ordering Questions
What are the dimensions of this apron? It measures 28 inches wide by 34 inches long with waist ties that are 42 inches on each side. These specific measurements ensure the garment covers the torso adequately while the long ties provide enough length to secure a tight knot comfortably in the front. Does the ink stay sharp after washing? The distressed style is part of the original print design rather than damage caused by wear. Because the faded look is intentional, repeated laundering maintains the aesthetic without appearing as if the product is failing or peeling over time. Why does this design feature a swimmer inside the text? The dark blue graphic of a diver is embedded directly within the large letters of DIVER. This visual detail connects the typographic slogan to the actual act of swimming, reinforcing the specific underwater context of the joke.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Diving aprons
- Who is the ideal buyer for these designs?
- These aprons are made for certified divers, marine biologists, and ocean enthusiasts who want to display their passion. They suit anyone who spends significant time in or around water and appreciates nautical aesthetics.
- What specific themes are included here?
- The collection features Hawaiian scenery, patriotic American flags, technical scuba gear illustrations, and humorous quotes about breathing underwater. Each design targets a different aspect of the diving community experience.
- How do I choose the right one?
- Select based on your primary interest, whether it is travel, patriotism, technical diving, or humor. Consider if you prefer realistic gear depictions or stylized graphic text that represents your identity as a diver.
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