

Annoy Writer Apron Featuring a Sarcastic Black Cat Novelist
Annoy writer apron - Black cat in glasses at desk with books and sarcastic writer warning text
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Annoy Writer Apron Featuring a Sarcastic Black Cat Novelist is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
annoy writer apron displays the phrase PLEASE DO NOT ANNOY THE WRITER SHE MAY PUT YOU IN A BOOK AND KILL YOU across the front. The text frames a cartoon black cat wearing glasses and sitting at a desk surrounded by piles of books. This sarcasm warns against disturbing creative focus while turning disruption into plot material. Wearing it signals you understand the need for silence during drafting. Readers and authors who have faced interruptions feel this was made for them.
The Design Itself
A black cat wearing glasses sits at a desk with piles of books and an open book in front of it. Two lines of text appear above the cat and two lines below, all printed in blue lettering. Yellow, orange, and red horizontal stripes create a retro background behind the feline subject. The image uses a cartoon art style to deliver a sarcastic warning about writerly patience. This layout ties the visual of the studious cat directly to the threat of narrative retribution found in the printed words.
Occasions It Fits
Writers and editors notice the sarcastic tone immediately when browsing for workwear. This annoy writer apron works well as a gift for the hobbyist who takes plotting seriously. It fits real situations where a home office doubles as a kitchen and focus is easily broken by household chores or visitors.
Things People Ask
What is the length of the neck strap on this product? The neck strap measures between 20 and 30 inches to accommodate different body types. This adjustable range ensures the black bib apron stays secure without digging into the neck during long writing sessions or cooking tasks. How does the ink hold up when washed regularly? The printed design remains durable through standard washing cycles because the ink bonds with the fabric surface. You can maintain the clarity of the blue text and colorful background without fading or peeling after repeated use. Does the warning imply a specific genre of writing? The specific phrasing about killing characters suggests fiction or thriller genres rather than technical documentation. The joke relies on the trope of an author punishing disruptive characters, which appeals most to those who craft narratives and dialogue.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Writer aprons
- Who is this collection best suited for?
- This collection is designed for writers of all types, including novelists, poets, journalists, and editors. It suits professionals who take pride in their craft and want to display their literary identity through wearable art that reflects their specific genre or role.
- What designs are included in this set?
- The set features diverse themes like the typewriter author apron, write sarcastic apron, and edgar ravens apron. Other options include the book publisher apron, fact writer apron, poet badass apron, future selling apron, and author wife apron, covering various aspects of the writing profession.
- How do I choose the right design?
- Select based on your primary writing style or favorite literary reference. Choose the typewriter author apron for classic vibes, or the write sarcastic apron for modern wit. Consider if you prefer poetry, journalism, or publishing themes when picking your preferred aesthetic from the available options.
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