

Cordless Hole Apron Featuring a Handgun and Patriotic Slogan
Cordless hole apron - Handgun over distressed US flag with text Since We Are Redefining Everything
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Cordless Hole Apron Featuring a Handgun and Patriotic Slogan is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
cordless hole apron displays the phrase SINCE WE'RE REDEFINING EVERYTHING, THIS IS A CORDLESS HOLE PUNCHER across the front. The text surrounds a grey handgun overlapping a distressed USA flag in red, white, and blue. This sarcastic reference recontextualizes the firearm as an office tool to make a political point. Wearing it signals a sharp sense of humor about current events, and gun enthusiasts or political commentators feel this design targets them specifically.
What The Print Says
The artwork features a central grey handgun positioned horizontally against a background of red and white stripes and a blue field with white stars. The lettering is split into two sections using a distressed font style where red highlights key words like REDEFINING and CORDLESS while white handles the rest. Four red bullets flank the lower text block, reinforcing the visual theme. The print belongs to the category of patriotic satire and relies on the contrast between bureaucratic language and violent imagery to generate its specific tone.
The Cook It Was Made For
This cordless hole apron suits cooks who enjoy political commentary or satirical humor in their kitchen. It serves as a conversation starter during Memorial Day gatherings or Fourth of July barbecues where national symbols are prevalent. The black bib apron provides practical protection while the wearer prepares food for guests who share this specific type of irreverent wit.
Ordering Questions
Does the neck strap accommodate different body sizes?
Yes, the adjustable neck strap measures between 20 and 30 inches to ensure a proper fit for most adults. This generous range allows the apron to sit correctly at the chest regardless of whether the wearer has a narrower or broader frame, preventing the fabric from digging in or hanging too low.
Will the ink remain durable after repeated laundering?
Yes, the print is designed to withstand washing without fading or peeling because the ink bonds securely with the black fabric. Users can maintain the sharpness of the distressed lettering and the vividness of the red and blue colors through standard care routines without needing specialized detergents or hand washing.
Is this design suitable for showing support at national holidays?
Yes, the inclusion of the USA flag motif and patriotic color palette makes it appropriate for Memorial Day or Independence Day events. The specific combination of the handgun graphic with the slogan creates a distinct statement that aligns with celebrations involving firearms culture and American symbolism.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Hole aprons
- Who will enjoy these themed aprons?
- Golfers, fishers, and Halloween enthusiasts who appreciate visual puns about gaps and openings will find these designs appealing. The collection suits those who enjoy lighthearted humor related to sports scores, winter activities, or classic literature references involving empty spaces.
- What themes are included here?
- Prints cover golf scores, ice fishing scenes, cornhole games, Halloween tricks, Alice in Wonderland rabbits, and Beavis references. Each design focuses on the concept of holes through sports, seasonal events, or pop culture icons familiar to fans of these topics.
- How do I choose the right one?
- Select based on your favorite activity or holiday. Golfers may prefer the scorecard print, while winter lovers might choose the fishing scene. Halloween fans could opt for the spooky trick-or-treat design, ensuring the visual matches their personal interests perfectly.
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