Emu
Distressed Australian Apron Featuring the Great Emu War
Distressed australian apron - Beige grid table listing 2 guys vs 20,000 emus casualties and pride stats
US$19.95
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
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US$19.95
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Distressed Australian Apron Featuring the Great Emu War is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
distressed australian apron displays the text THE GREAT EMU WAR across the top panel. A beige grid table lists combatants, strength, and casualties using sarcasm to highlight that 2 guys faced 20,000 emus with 986 bird casualties versus human pride. Wearing it signals appreciation for quirky historical trivia, and amateur historians in Western Australia feel this specific design was made for them.
The Artwork Explained
A beige distressed layout arranged as a military-style data table sits prominently on the front panel. The header reads THE GREAT EMU WAR above sections labeled COMBATANTS, STRENGTH, and CASUALTIES. Visuals include a Union Jack flag and an emu silhouette representing the opposing forces. Numerical details show 2 GUYS against 20,000 EMUS, with results listing PRIDE for humans and 986 EMUS for the birds. This satirical graphic mimics a vintage report card for a 1932 conflict in Western Australia.
Kitchens It Belongs In
This black bib apron belongs to cooks who enjoy weird history or teaching Australian geography. It serves as a conversation starter during family gatherings or birthday celebrations for the amateur historian in your life. The generous cut protects clothing while preparing meals in kitchens where serious cooking meets lighthearted storytelling about flightless birds.
What Buyers Ask
What is the neck strap length?
The adjustable neck strap measures between 20 and 30 inches to ensure a secure fit for most adults. This range accommodates various body types and allows the wearer to tighten the fabric against the chest for better protection while cooking.
Does the ink withstand washing?
The distressed print remains durable through standard laundering because the ink bonds deeply with the black cotton fabric. You can wash this product safely without worrying about the beige text fading or the grid pattern peeling away from the surface.
Why does the casualty count list PRIDE?
The design uses irony to explain the outcome of the 1932 event where soldiers failed to stop the birds. While 986 emus were counted as casualties, the human side suffered only a loss of ego rather than physical injury, which is the core joke of the graphic.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Emu aprons
- Who is this collection best suited for?
- It is ideal for Australian wildlife enthusiasts, ornithology students, and zookeepers who admire emus. The designs also appeal to pet owners who view emus as companions and travelers who have visited remote Australian regions where these birds roam freely across open plains.
- What specific emu themes are included?
- You will find designs ranging from humorous expressions to patriotic symbols. Options include the koala kangaroo apron pairing species, the emu german apron for cultural fusion, and the emus i love my emu apron for personal expression, ensuring there is a style for every type of bird fan.
- How do I choose the right design?
- Consider whether you prefer subtle wildlife art or bold bold design. Select the amused animal apron for humor, the war emu lover apron for patriotism, or the koala kangaroo apron for broader Australian iconography. Each piece highlights different aspects of emu behavior and appearance.
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