

Sit Steven Rhodes Apron Featuring Don't Sit Too Close
Sit steven rhodes apron - Red and blue frame around green monster pulling person into TV, text Don't Sit Too Close
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Sit Steven Rhodes Apron Featuring Don't Sit Too Close is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
sit steven rhodes apron displays the warning DON'T SIT TOO CLOSE TO THE TELEVISION across the top in stacked red and blue lettering. A green monster pulls a person into a screen while two children watch, landing as a satirical take on old health warnings. Wearing it signals appreciation for dark humor and vintage aesthetics, and fans of 1970s and 1980s retro style feel this was made for them.
The Artwork Details
Stacked text reading DON'T SIT TOO CLOSE TO THE TELEVISION sits at the top of the panel in red and blue ink. A red and blue frame encloses a cartoon scene where a green monster drags a person wearing a yellow shirt and blue pants into a television set. Two children observe from the floor below, and a small blue pill-shaped label at the bottom reads Health & Wellbeing. The composition combines these elements to create a cohesive image of ironic safety advice rendered in a retro cartoon style.
Occasions and Wearers
This apron fits cooks who appreciate irony and vintage pop culture references. It serves as a unique gift for fans of dark humor and 1980s aesthetic parody. The garment gets worn in everyday kitchen situations where its bold message stands out against standard culinary wear.
Things People Ask
What is the measurement of the pockets on this apron? The pockets measure 8 x 7 inches each to provide ample storage space. They are positioned on the front and split in the middle to allow the wearer to reach easily without obstruction. This specific dimension ensures that large utensils or folded towels fit securely within the canvas structure. How does the ink withstand washing cycles? The printed design holds up through standard laundering because the ink bonds with the 10 oz cotton canvas. The fabric texture grips the pigment effectively, preventing the bold red, blue, and green colors from fading or cracking during the wash process. Proper care maintains the vibrancy of the vintage-style illustration over time. Does the phrase refer to a specific medical condition or era? The text refers to outdated public health advisories from past decades rather than current medical science. The inclusion of Health & Wellbeing at the bottom confirms the design functions as a parody of vintage safety posters. The visual of a monster reinforces this by treating the old warning as a literal supernatural threat.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Rhode aprons
- Who would enjoy the steven cat apron?
- Fans of feline-themed humor and the specific character Steven will appreciate this design. It combines pet lover sentiments with a quirky artistic style that stands out. The print offers a own twist to express affection for cats while showcasing a distinct character motif that resonates with collectors of niche art prints.
- What makes the steven stupid apron different?
- This design leans into self-deprecating humor and absurdity, distinguishing itself from more traditional themed aprons. It appeals to those who enjoy ironic statements and unconventional fashion choices. The print captures a specific cultural joke format, making it a standout piece for individuals who prioritize wit and novelty in their everyday accessories.
- How do I choose between the alien and magic versions?
- Select the alien version if you prefer sci-fi themes and extraterrestrial imagery. Choose the magic version for fantasy elements and illusionist aesthetics. Consider your personal interest in genre-specific humor to decide which design aligns better with your taste. Both feature the central character but offer distinctly different visual narratives and thematic contexts.
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