
Decision Malt Apron: Whiskey
US$19.95
Printed to order in the USA · Flat US$4.95 US shipping, free over US$65.00

Tested blood apron - Hand holding scotch glass with I Had My Blood Tested Turns Out I'm Scotch text
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Tested Blood Apron Featuring a Scotch Pun is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
The tested blood apron puts the phrase "I HAD MY BLOOD TESTED, TURNS OUT I'M SCOTCH" across the front panel, and the words read as a clever pun implying the wearer possesses the bold character of the spirit. Wearing it allows the user to display their affinity for single malts with humor, and scotch enthusiasts will feel this was created specifically for their kitchen or bar setup.
A hand holding a glass filled with amber liquid takes center stage on the black bib in a detailed line-art style. The illustration uses only white and orange ink to define the fingers and the contents of the glass against the dark background. Two lines of text appear directly beneath the artwork, with the top line rendered in orange and the bottom line in white. This layout creates a balanced visual hierarchy where the graphic leads the eye down to the punchline. The entire composition relies on high contrast to ensure the message remains legible from a distance.
Whiskey lovers notice the specific reference to single malt before they see the protective function of the garment. This tested blood apron works as a unique good times whiskey design for any holiday or casual gathering. It gets worn in everyday situations where cooking or serving requires protection without sacrificing personality. The design acts as a conversation starter for guests who share a similar appreciation for barrel-aged spirits.
Does this apron fit different body types? Yes, the tested blood apron has a generous cut designed for most adults. The adjustable neck strap measures between 20 and 30 inches to accommodate various neck sizes comfortably. This flexibility ensures the garment stays secure whether the wearer is tall or short, making it a practical choice for diverse kitchen staff.
How does the ink hold up to washing? The white and orange print is durable enough to withstand standard cleaning cycles without fading. Since the design uses solid blocks of color rather than fine gradients, the edges remain sharp after repeated laundering. The contrast between the bright ink and the black fabric helps maintain the visibility of the pun over time.
What makes this design specific to scotch lovers? The text explicitly identifies the subject as scotch rather than generic alcohol or other spirits. The visual of the hand holding the glass reinforces this connection through the classic shape of a rocks glass used for neat whiskey. No other product combines this specific phrase with this particular illustration style to target single malt enthusiasts.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
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