

Baphomet Unicorn Apron Featuring a Satanic Rainbow Unicorn
Baphomet unicorn apron - Cartoon winged unicorn in rainbow circle with NOT TODAY JESUS text
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Baphomet Unicorn Apron Featuring a Satanic Rainbow Unicorn is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
baphomet unicorn apron puts a winged, horned creature inside a rainbow circle across the front panel, and the words NOT TODAY JESUS land as a sarcastic refusal to engage in spiritual activities. Wearing it signals a preference for dark humor over traditional decorum, and a fan of goth or satanic aesthetics will feel this was made specifically for their irreverent kitchen style.
What Is Printed On It
A cartoon-style creature with wings and a horn sits cross-legged at the center of the design, enclosed within a circular rainbow border. The word NOT appears above the circle, TODAY arches over the top edge, and JESUS anchors the bottom. The lettering features a gradient incorporating pink, yellow, and other spectrum colors. A pentagram marks the forehead and a caduceus symbol rests on the belly. These elements combine to create a satirical take on occult iconography using bright, playful coloring rather than ominous tones.
Who Reaches For This One
Lovers of dark humor and satanic imagery notice the juxtaposition of a cute unicorn with profane text first. This baphomet unicorn apron serves as a humorous gift for anyone who enjoys goth, emo, or death metal fashion. It gets worn in everyday cooking situations where the wearer wants to express a witty, rebellious attitude toward domestic chores.
Questions Before You Order
Does the neck strap accommodate thick sweatshirts? Yes, the adjustable neck strap measures between 20 and 30 inches to ensure a comfortable fit over bulky winter layers or heavy work shirts without pulling uncomfortably tight against the neck.
Will the rainbow ink withstand machine washing? The printed graphics are designed to hold up against standard laundering cycles, maintaining the vivid pink, yellow, and spectrum gradients without significant fading or cracking when cared for properly.
Is the central symbol a traditional Baphomet sigil? No, the design features a stylized winged unicorn with specific occult markings like a pentagram and caduceus rather than the geometric goat-headed sigil typically associated with the name Baphomet in historical texts.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Today aprons
- Who is this collection best suited for?
- This collection is ideal for individuals who enjoy expressing their sense of humor through their attire. It works well for fans of memes, pop culture references, and fictional characters who want to add a detail to their kitchen activities without being overly loud or aggressive in their style choices.
- What types of designs are included here?
- You will find a variety of themes ranging from religious parody like Jesus Not Today to sitcom references such as Peter Not Today. There are also absurdist jokes like the Pooped Gag series and fantasy elements in the Unlock Magic design, ensuring there is something for almost every type of humor lover.
- How do I choose the right one?
- Consider which character or meme resonates most with your personal taste. If you love family sitcoms, the Peter design might be perfect. For those who appreciate darker or more abstract humor, the Satan Meme or Pooped Gag options could be better fits based on your preferred comedic style.
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