Sloth
Brag Sloth Apron Featuring Sarcastic Text About Getting Out
Brag sloth apron - Brown cartoon sloth waving between white text blocks reading not to brag but i totally got out
US$19.95
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
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US$19.95
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Brag Sloth Apron Featuring Sarcastic Text About Getting Out is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
brag sloth apron puts the phrase NOT TO BRAG BUT I TOTALLY GOT OUT OF BED TODAY across the front panel, and the words read as a sarcastic declaration of a small personal victory. Wearing it signals a preference for low-effort accomplishments, and home cooks who value humor over hustle feel it was made for them.
What Is Printed On It
Two lines of white text sit above a brown cartoon sloth, and two more lines appear below it to frame the character. The sloth stands upright with one arm raised in a wave, rendered in a simple illustrative style. The lettering is bold and capitalized, emphasizing the irony of the statement. This layout turns the act of rising from sleep into a triumphant event rather than a mundane task.
Who Reaches For This One
Kitchen workers and relaxation enthusiasts notice the witty message first when they see this product. It makes a great gift for birthdays, graduation, Mothers Day, or Fathers Day for someone who appreciates sleepy apparel. People wear it while watching a game or preparing meals to signal that they are taking things easy.
Questions Before You Order
What are the measurements for fit? The body size is 28 inches wide by 34 inches long, providing ample coverage for the torso. Waist ties measure 42 inches on each side, which is long enough to tie securely in front without leaving excess fabric hanging down.
How does the ink hold up to washing? The printed design is durable enough to withstand regular cleaning cycles because the ink adheres directly to the fabric surface. Users can wash the item to maintain the crispness of the white lettering and the saturation of the brown tones without fear of fading or peeling.
Does this design reference a specific holiday? The text specifically references the act of getting out of bed today, which applies to any day of the year rather than a single occasion. This makes the design versatile for everyday use in the kitchen or as general loungewear, unlike seasonal prints that become obsolete after a few weeks.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Sloth aprons
- Who should buy these aprons?
- These are ideal for people who enjoy a relaxed lifestyle and want to add humor to their kitchen. If you identify as someone who takes life slowly and appreciates cute animal imagery, this collection matches your personality perfectly.
- What makes these designs unique?
- Each design highlights different aspects of sloth behavior, from sleeping in trees to enjoying sunsets. The variety allows you to pick a specific mood, such as superhero power or peaceful meditation, ensuring the apron reflects your personal sense of humor and aesthetic preference.
- How do I choose the right one?
- Consider your current mood or favorite activity. Choose the bed sloth if you love naps, or the superhero version for fun energy. Matching the design to your preferred style of relaxation ensures you feel comfortable and connected to the artwork while wearing it during your kitchen activities.
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