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Printed to order in the USA · Flat US$4.95 US shipping, free over US$65.00

Epic dragon apron - White and gold dragon above stacked text reading I'm not procrastinating I'm doing side quests — shown on a black cotton canvas apron against a white background
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Epic Dragon Apron Featuring White and Gold Typography

Epic dragon apron - White and gold dragon above stacked text reading I'm not procrastinating I'm doing side quests

US$19.95

Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.

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US$19.95

Delivery to United States

Arrives

Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.

Returns

Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.

Printed to order

Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.

Epic Dragon Apron Featuring White and Gold Typography is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.

epic dragon apron puts the phrase "I'M NOT PROCRASTINATING I'M DOING SIDE QUESTS" across the front panel, and those words land as a humorous excuse for gaming sessions. Wearing it signals to fellow players that cooking is just another RPG task, and tabletop gamers know exactly who this was made for.

A Closer Look At The Artwork

A white and gold dragon head sits at the top of the panel with wings extending outward in a symmetrical pose. Stacked lettering below the creature reads I'M NOT PROCRASTINATING I'M DOING SIDE QUESTS in alternating white and gold fonts. Decorative gold swirls and ornaments separate the text lines, adding ornamental detail between the phrases. This typography-only art style relies on font weight and color contrast rather than complex illustrations. The design functions as a visual pun where the serious aesthetic of a fantasy crest contrasts with the mundane admission of avoiding work.

Where It Earns Its Keep

Gamer cooks notice the specific reference to side quests immediately upon seeing the design. Gifting this epic dragon apron works well for birthdays or holidays for anyone who identifies with RPG humor. Everyday use happens when someone needs to cook but wants to acknowledge their actual priorities are elsewhere. The two front pockets allow them to carry tools without interrupting their mental immersion in a game world.

Good To Know

Does the apron fit over bulky layers? Yes, the 10 oz cotton canvas has enough room for sweaters underneath. The stiff fabric holds its shape even when worn over thick winter gear or hoodies. Two front pockets split in the middle maintain accessibility regardless of layering thickness. You will not feel restricted moving your arms while wearing heavy clothing under this protective layer.

Will the graphic survive repeated washes? The white and gold ink remains distinct after multiple cycles because the canvas fabric is dense. Stiff material prevents the print from cracking or peeling like softer fabrics might. Softening occurs naturally after two to three washes without damaging the decorative gold swirls. You can clean spills frequently without worrying about fading the humorous lettering.

Is this design specific to fantasy roleplay? The side quests terminology specifically references RPG mechanics rather than general gaming slang. No other product combines this exact phrase with a dragon motif in this layout. The pun relies entirely on understanding that side quests are optional activities players choose over main storylines. This specificity ensures only true fantasy enthusiasts recognize the intended joke behind the cooking metaphor.

Questions about Side aprons

Who is the ideal buyer for these themed aprons?
These aprons are designed for home cooks and entertainers who want to show their passion for rock music, fantasy roleplaying games, and vintage comics. They suit anyone who enjoys wearing their hobbies on their sleeve and wants to start conversations in the kitchen or at parties.
What themes are featured in this specific collection?
This collection features designs inspired by Pink Floyd album art, Dungeons and Dragons roleplaying terminology, and classic newspaper comic strips. You will also find playful novelty patterns that blend food humor with geek culture references, ensuring there is something for every type of enthusiast.
How should I choose the right design from this set?
Select a design based on your primary interest. Choose the Floyd or Moon Pink Floyd aprons if you love classic rock. Pick the RPG Crew Apron for gaming friends. Opt for the View Comics Apron for nostalgia. Consider the Funny Food Novelty Apron for general humor. Match the print to the personality you wish to project.

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