

Attempted Murder Ravens Apron: Retro Two Crows Design
Attempted murder ravens apron - Two crows standing before a striped yellow orange and red sun above stacked grey
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Attempted Murder Ravens Apron: Retro Two Crows Design is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
The phrase "attempted murder ravens apron" puts two crows centered before a retro striped sun across the front panel, and the stacked text ATTEMPTED MURREAD lands as a pun referencing the collective noun for corvids rather than criminal activity. Wearing it signals appreciation for literary wordplay while working, and writers or literary critics reading the label feel it was made specifically for their sense of humor.
The Design Itself
Two black crows stand side-by-side in the center of the panel, positioned directly in front of a circular background composed of horizontal stripes in yellow, orange, red, and grey. The artwork utilizes a retro aesthetic where the colors are separated by thin grey lines, creating a sunset effect behind the birds. Below this imagery, the words ATTEMPTED MURDER are stacked vertically in a distressed, light grey typeface that resembles weathered stenciling. This layout combines the biological fact that crows form a murder with vintage graphic design tropes to create a cohesive visual statement about avian nomenclature.
Occasions It Fits
Cooking enthusiasts who enjoy literature notice the clever wordplay involving crows and ravens immediately upon viewing the design. This apron serves as an ideal gift for literary critics, editors, or anyone who appreciates Edgar Allan Poe's influence on pop culture. It fits naturally into everyday kitchen situations where the wearer wants to display intellectual humor alongside their culinary skills, bridging the gap between heavy poetry and domestic chores.
Things People Ask
Do the pockets hold large items securely? Yes, the two front pockets provide ample storage space because each pocket measures exactly 8 by 7 inches. They are split in the middle to create four distinct compartments, allowing you to organize tools or linens efficiently without the fabric sagging excessively under weight during active use.
Will the retro print fade after repeated washing? The ink remains durable because the design is printed onto 10 oz cotton canvas which withstands standard laundering cycles. While the fabric softens after two to three washes, the pigment bonds with the sturdy weave to maintain the sharpness of the striped sun and lettering over time.
Does this design reference actual crime or just bird terminology? The phrase refers strictly to ornithology because a group of corvids is traditionally called a murder in folklore. The word attempted modifies this collective noun to suggest the birds failed to gather in sufficient numbers, creating a witty linguistic play that has no connection to criminal acts or violence.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Crow Raven aprons
- Who enjoys the crow meme apron most?
- People who love internet culture and dark humor appreciate this design. It resonates with those who understand the viral jokes surrounding crows and their clever behaviors. Fans of witty, modern commentary on social media often select this piece for its relatable and humorous nod to online trends and bird intelligence.
- What makes the raven halloween apron unique?
- This design specifically targets Halloween celebrations by featuring iconic raven imagery associated with the spooky season. It appeals to those who enjoy festive attire that nods to classic horror tropes without being overly scary. The theme fits perfectly for autumn events, parties, or anyone wanting to takes in the magical and mysterious atmosphere of October.
- How does the murder bird apron differ from others?
- The murder bird apron plays on the collective noun for crows, offering a clever wordplay twist. It suits birdwatchers and language enthusiasts who appreciate ornithological facts presented in a smart format. Unlike purely decorative options, this design adds an educational layer to your kitchen attire, sparking conversations about avian social structures.
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