

Crow Ravens Apron Featuring an Attempt Murder Pun
Crow ravens apron - Grey crow silhouette over striped moon with arched attempt murder text
Flat US$4.95 US shipping · free over US$65.00 · sales tax is calculated from your shipping address at checkout.
Delivery to United States
Arrives —
Orders ship within the United States only. Flat US$4.95 shipping under US$65.00 — free from US$65.00.
Returns
Request a return or exchange within 30 days of purchase, for any reason — we cover return shipping.
Printed to order
Every apron is printed after you order it. Please allow 1-3 business days for processing before it leaves the print shop.
Crow Ravens Apron Featuring an Attempt Murder Pun is printed on a black canvas apron — one size, made to order and shipped within the United States.
crow ravens apron displays the phrase ATTEMPTED MURDER arched over a grey crow silhouette against a striped moon. The pun relies on the collective noun for crows being a murder, implying two birds only nearly completed the flock. Wearing it signals appreciation for dark wit and minimalist graphic design, and anyone who enjoys wordplay involving avian flocks will recognize the reference immediately.
What The Print Says
The print features a minimalist grey crow silhouette centered directly over a textured moon marked with horizontal white stripes. The word ATTEMPTED arches across the top in a vintage typeface, while MURDER curves along the bottom to frame the image. This layout uses only grey and white tones to create a stark, retro aesthetic that highlights the pun. The design belongs to a niche of mystical or occult humor where the specific count of birds is the entire joke rather than a generic nature scene.
The Cook It Was Made For
This crow ravens apron suits cooks who appreciate dark humor and occult aesthetics during meal preparation. It serves as a distinctive gift for friends who collect wiccan or pagan inspired merchandise. The long waist ties allow it to be worn securely during active cooking sessions without slipping off.
Ordering Questions
What are the dimensions of the apron body? The body measures 28 inches wide by 34 inches long, providing ample coverage for the torso and thighs during messy cooking tasks. This substantial surface area protects clothing from spills and splatters effectively while maintaining a professional appearance in the kitchen.
How does the ink hold up after cleaning? The printed design is durable enough to withstand standard washing cycles, ensuring the grey silhouette and text remain visible through multiple uses. The print quality is maintained even after repeated exposure to water and detergent, keeping the retro aesthetic intact over time.
Does the design feature a single bird or a group? The artwork depicts exactly one crow silhouette to visually represent an attempted murder, distinguishing it from designs showing full flocks. This specific count is essential to the joke, as a complete murder requires many more birds to be present in the illustration.
Every apron is printed after you order it. Orders are processed Monday through Friday, excluding federal holidays — please allow 1-3 business days for order processing. After processing, shipping typically takes 3-7 business days inside the United States, so the total delivery time from order placement is 4-10 business days.
US orders under US$65.00 pay a flat US$4.95 shipping; orders of US$65.00 or more ship free. Bearhap ships within the United States only — we do not ship to international addresses.
You may request a return or exchange within 30 days of the purchase date, for any reason. The apron must be unopened, unused and in its original packaging, with proof of purchase. We refund the item price in full to the original payment method — the original US$4.95 shipping fee is not refundable — and Bearhap covers all return shipping costs: email contact@bearhap.com for a free return label.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out, with like colours. Tumble dry low or hang to dry. Do not iron directly over the print — press from the back if you need to. No bleach, no dry cleaning.
The ink is water-based and cures into the fabric, so it will soften with the canvas rather than peel off it.
Questions about Crow Raven aprons
- Who enjoys the crow meme apron most?
- People who love internet culture and dark humor appreciate this design. It resonates with those who understand the viral jokes surrounding crows and their clever behaviors. Fans of witty, modern commentary on social media often select this piece for its relatable and humorous nod to online trends and bird intelligence.
- What makes the raven halloween apron unique?
- This design specifically targets Halloween celebrations by featuring iconic raven imagery associated with the spooky season. It appeals to those who enjoy festive attire that nods to classic horror tropes without being overly scary. The theme fits perfectly for autumn events, parties, or anyone wanting to takes in the magical and mysterious atmosphere of October.
- How does the murder bird apron differ from others?
- The murder bird apron plays on the collective noun for crows, offering a clever wordplay twist. It suits birdwatchers and language enthusiasts who appreciate ornithological facts presented in a smart format. Unlike purely decorative options, this design adds an educational layer to your kitchen attire, sparking conversations about avian social structures.
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